*88\186\4*

[The boy] fell gradually into a total want of appetite, occasioned by his studying too hard, and the passions of his mind, and upon that into a universal atrophy, pining away more and more for the space of two years … I advised him to abandon his studies, to go into the country air, and to use riding, and milk diet (and especially to drink Asses milk) for a long time. By the use of which he recovered his health in a great measure, though he is not yet perfectly freed from a consumptive state . . .

The criteria for diagnosing anorexia are virtually the same in both sexes. Like female anorexics, male anorexics starve themselves and may or may not use self-induced vomiting or some other extreme means of weight control. Males experience fear of fatness related to loss of control over eating. Paralleling the female’s loss of menstruation, there is a disorder in the activity of the reproductive hormones. This leads to a decline of interest in sex and a decrease in ability to perform.

The pattern that anorexia follows in men and women is also similar. Although the illness occurs in people from all social levels, there is a disproportionately high incidence among the upper classes. Depression is more common in families with a male anorexic member; his siblings are also more likely than average to have anorexia nervosa. Some anorexic males are involved in activities in which low weight or weight control is valued. Those at particular risk include jockeys, ballet dancers, wrestlers, flight attendants, and models.

The illness usually begins during the boy’s adolescent years. The trigger is often an attempt at dieting, although it may also be a stressful life event, a disappointment caused by failure at school, “or” a social loss such as rejection by a girlfriend. Sometimes a prolonged illness leads to weight loss. If the boy sees the loss as desirable for some reason, he may decide to continue starving himself.

Homosexuality is not a criterion. Part of the tragedy of eating disorders is that they strike vulnerable individuals at a time of life-adolescence-that is already fraught with enough emotional and physical turmoil to last a lifetime. During the teen years, young people have their hands full trying to recognize just who they are and to incorporate that awareness into their personalities. Confusion reigns-confusion about gender identity, social roles, self-worth. Youngsters who start out with low self-esteem and poor ego defenses may feel successful in achieving thinness. That feeling then escalates into a vicious cycle of anorexia.

These young men, like anorexic young women, are literally starving for attention.

*27/35/5*

After about 13 years, her weight had crept up to more than 235 pounds. She was working 70-hour weeks managing several manufacturing groups. Even though she never had time or energy to work out, she wanted and needed to be active. “I felt guilty that I wasn’t, so I ate even more,” she says.

Then one day, Cindy asked her husband a question that most men would never want to answer: “Does my weight bother you?” His thoughtful response turned Cindy’s life around: “What I miss is being active and doing fun things with you.”

“His words made me want to be a better woman,” Cindy says. Her first step was to join a health club, where she took a beginner-level aerobics class. But she knew that wouldn’t be enough to give her the healthy, balanced life she desired. So, 6 months into her exercise program, she quit her job and went back to school to become an esthetician. (Estheticians do facial and body treatments.)

This wasn’t a rash decision on Cindy’s part. “I had accomplished everything that I had wanted to in my job, and I felt that it was time for me to move on,” she explains. “Having my own beauty business was a lifelong dream, so I decided to go for it.”

With that single decision, Cindy unloaded much of the stress that had driven her weight gain in the first place. “It was the best thing that I ever did for myself,” she says. She no longer felt the overwhelming urge to overeat. She got back to the active and athletic life that she had known before. Gradually, she lost 85 pounds.

These days, Cindy works just 3 days a week, operating her own skin-care center. She’s also training for her second sprint triathlon, a race involving a roughly l/i-mile swim, a 20-mile bike ride, and a 10K run. Most important, she’s happy. “I made the choice to find the balance that was missing in my life,” she says.

WINNING ACTION

Find out what really matters. Like Cindy, so many of us are in jobs that we don’t care about, and we aren’t doing the things that we love. We numb ourselves with food as a way of stuffing down our real emotions, desires, and dreams. But life is short and we go around only once. Draw courage

*81\89\8*